The Waiiiiaiaiting is the Hardest Part

Now that you are mostly caught up on that part of my past, I feel as thought I can continue with my present.


I am 25 years old. I do not have a ton of credentials but I am proud of what I have done.


However, I still have a lot to do and learn. 


One such example is I have no idea how to fight. I do not know how to stand up for myself. I was raised with manners, never spunk. And if I am in a fight with you you probably won't know it because the fight will be in my imagination as I will rarely confront you. I've heard it said that if it's for someone else, you should fight. If it's for you, walk away. I have had a lot of spare time recently and I have started to write an evaluation of myself. I noticed that I am a people pleaser. I started focusing my attention on realizing how demonic this actually is. We know that you cannot serve both Christ and live to please people. 


I am not a big fan of taking scripture out of context in order to prove my point and Lord correct me if I'm wrong on this one, but Galatians 1:10 tells us, "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ." 


And James 4:4 states, "You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God." 


In order to justify to myself my need to please people, I tell myself that I want people to think highly of me because I represent Christ, and if I'm an ass- what will they think of my Lord. 


The thing He has taught me about that is that it is my job only to represent Him as He demands, and as with all things in life, we are never responsible for other peoples' reactions. Period. If I am following Christ and if He is pleased with me, then the perceptions of others are between them and God. 


That's refreshing to me. 


Now of course, no matter how hard I try and no matter how much effort I put in, I am human, and I am sinful by nature. Now that is not an excuse to make foolish decisions, but it does pose the question (as did DC Talk) What If I Stumble? God tells us in Philippians 1:6 that, "he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Obviously, we are not perfect, we will stumble, and we will make terrible decisions- sometimes on purpose- but one day, we will not struggle with our sinful nature. That is so exciting to me. And while all my life experiences are so wonderful to me and I do not wish them to be over any time soon- I do wait for the day when I don't have to struggle with such mortal problems. And I think we can all agree with our dear friends Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers that The Waiiiiaiaiaiting is the hardest part.